CHOOSE YOUR WORDS

A successful communication can't be measured by number of words you utter or write. And usually, with too many words we say too little. One of my personal commandments is to significantly improve my communication skills. Meaning, trying to reduce a number of conflicts, disagreements, arguments, frustrations and all the other consequences of poor communication that tend to make my life bitter. And believe me, this is possible if you devote just a bit of attention to these skills - how to communicate, how to avoid your common mistakes and so on.

Earlier in life, I was much more critical not only of my own, but of other people's actions as well. Gradually, I began to judge and criticize less, and accept and understand myself and people around me more, which made me feel better.

As a result of our constant need to say something, to express ourselves, we talk all the time, but no one listens. Facebook is a typical example of how people can hit the roof when discussing certain topics - they get into endless arguments, they quarrel, insult each other. But saying everything that's on our mind, doesn't make our life easier. On the contrary.

Where do we usually make mistakes?

1. We do not listen enough - In most cases, our urge to answer and state our personal opinion doesn't allow us to concentrate on what the other person is saying.

2. Hastiness - We're usually in such a hurry to respond (at least I am), before we even form a clear message in our minds. Most often, we articulate the first thing that comes to our mind... This proves to be a bad idea, cause most of the times we do that, only the wrong words come out of our mouth.

3. Misconception about honesty - Successful communication involves honesty, but not at any price. Think about what you're going to say, cause not everything should be revealed to others. Think about what kind of effect your words may produce. One of the secrets of successful communication is maintaining the harmony between thoughts, words and actions.

4. Lack of intent to understand - Don't close your mind, be open to accept diversity.

5. Too many emotions - Emotions, especially the really intense ones, hamper communication, primarily when it comes to controversial issues. Keep in mind that emotions usually do not allow us to rationally consider a certain dilemma and often create a problem where it doesn't even exist.

There are innumerable opportunities for improving your communication skills. Pay attention to how you communicate and where you commonly make mistakes. Successful communication makes it possible to understand each other better and live a carefree life. Learn to listen. Most people talk too much and listen too little. I'll remind you that God gave us one mouth and two ears. Prepare yourself to accept diversity, try to understand, don't rush to give an answer, don't bother so much if you disagree with someone. Agree to disagree - this is the best solution.